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I remember my older brother Tom who I often disagree with saying to me one day, “Do you know why God put me in your life?…To teach you patience!” Truer words were never spoken.

After 50 years of counseling people through divorce, addictions, and an array of problems, I’ve come to the conclusion that there were reasons for most of these situations. Most often it is to help the person to become the person they are not. And I certainly need patience!

None of us have whole personalities. We marry a person who is so different than ourselves. Why? Opposites attract – for a God-given reason. To help us become the person that we need to become to fulfill God’s dream for us, even if it is a most painful process. Down deep we want to become a whole person, fully human and fully alive.

In marriage or in a very close relationship, the other person through patience, love and perseverance can help the other to become the person they are not. The “spender” can help the “saver”, and vice versa. The “morning” person can help the “evening” person, and vice versa, The “talker” can help the “quiet” person, and vice versa.

Ellie Weisel, the holocaust survivor, philosopher and Nobel Prize winner said:

“The only question God is going to ask us when we die is,
‘Did you become the person that you are?’”

God had and has a dream for each one of us, to be fully human and fully alive.
But we need help in finding the missing piece or two
To become what God has had in mind for us.

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